I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
