oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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