Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
