Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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