Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
