Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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