I'd wear matching sweaters with you
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
look no pants
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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