You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
