Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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