DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
