hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Randomize
