Don't you send me to vm
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
