There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
