just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
i've created a new STD.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
You were trust falling into bushes
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
