Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
