Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Randomize
