if i can run in heels then i can drive
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
