Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
