if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
