if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
