She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
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