hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Randomize
