Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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