You're so nebulous sometimes
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
