We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Your dad touched me again.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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