haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
