Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
