Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
