we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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