Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Two words: blizzard sex
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Randomize
