You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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