TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
