im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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