He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I could fuck to npr.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
