I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
