carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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