That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
