I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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