somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Randomize
