i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
