I need help removing her.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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