Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
