Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
So vagazzling was a success
Randomize