U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
