Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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