8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize