Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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