OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
