dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize