Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
