Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
