roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Houston, we have a squirter
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
