haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
