my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize